Sad Jokes (2024)

Bad Faith

On January 6, 2021, Americans witnessed an attack on the U.S. Capitol without precedent in our history. Armed militiamen and QAnon followers made headlines, but among them were a sea of crosses and Christian flags, rosaries and "Jesus Saves" signs. What motivated so many Christians to participate in this violent assault?

The Land Before Time XII: The Great Day of the Flyers

As the Great Day of the Flyers nears, the Great Valley's flying youngsters are eager to participate in the annual exhibition to show off their skills. Everyone, that is, except free-spirited pterodactyl Petrie, whose individualism causes problems when it comes to staying in formation. Enter his dinosaur pals Littlefoot, Cera, Spike and Ducky, who encourage Petrie to embrace his uniqueness.

Area of Conflict

Human traffickers wipe out a young girl's family and village. She then seeks revenge on those responsible, eventually becoming first the hunted then turning into the hunters with the mercenary hired to eliminate her.

The Desperado Trail

Rollins' gang wants to grab land by inciting the settlers in a war against the Indians but Winnetou and Old Shatterhand try to keep the peace, until Rollins frames Winnetou up for the murder of Jicarilla Chief's son.

Succubus

A new father going through a marital separation joins a dating app and matches with a beautiful but mysterious young woman... whose powers of seduction and manipulation entangle him in a mystery more horrifying than he could have ever imagined.

The Land Before Time VIII: The Big Freeze

When the dinosaur families get trapped in a valley by an ice storm, one family of "spike tail" dinosaurs volunteers to leave since they consume more food than the others. Meanwhile, the young dinos and a new adult dinosaur named Mr. Thicknose, head out to bring back their friend Spike, who has left his friends to be with members of his own species.

Teacher's Pet

A rugged city editor poses as a journalism student and flirts with the professor.

Even Money

Gambling addiction bring the stories of three otherwise unconnected people together as it destroys each of their lives.

Johan Falk: The Outlaws

Johan is a two-fisted Gothenburg cop who finds himself in a shoot-out with jewel robbers. After the smoke has cleared, one robber, shot by his accomplice, and an innocent bystander, are dead. Three witnesses, including Helen, identify thug extraordinaire Leo Gaut as being the dead crook's trigger-happy colleague. Gaut soon threatens the three witnesses, and only Johan, the badge-wearing hero, can save them.

WWE WrestleMania XXV

WrestleMania XXV was the twenty-fifth annual WrestleMania PPV. It was presented by the National Guard and took place on April 5, 2009 at Reliant Stadium in Houston, Texas. The first main event was a singles match for the WWE Championship that featured the champion, Triple H, defending against Randy Orton. The second was a Triple Threat match for the World Heavyweight Championship, between defedning champion Edge against John Cena & Big Show. The third main event was The Undertaker versus Shawn Michaels. Featured matches on the undercard included, Jeff Hardy versus Matt Hardy in an Extreme Rules match, Chris Jericho versus the team of Roddy Piper, Ricky Steamboat and Jimmy Snuka, and the annual Money in the Bank ladder match featuring Kane, MVP, Mark Henry, Shelton Benjamin, Kofi Kingston, CM Punk, Christian, & Finlay. With an attendance of 72,744, it is the 6th largest attendance in WrestleMania history.

Gunpowder

At the end of September 1941, Soviet artillery troops in besieged Leningrad realize that pretty soon they will fire their last shot, and after that the defense of the city will be doomed. The film is based on a true event: a small group of fearless soldiers transported a large supply of gunpowder through enemy lines to Leningrad.

Battles Without Honor and Humanity: Final Episode

While Hirono is in prison, his rival Takeda turns his own crime organization into a political party, whose two executives stir up new tensions in their thirst for power.

The Thief and the Cobbler

It is written among the limitless constellations of the celestial heavens, and in the depths of the emerald seas, and upon every grain of sand in the vast deserts, that the world which we see is an outward and visible dream, of an inward and invisible reality ... Once upon a time there was a golden city. In the center of the golden city, atop the tallest minaret, were three golden balls. The ancients had prophesied that if the three golden balls were ever taken away, harmony would yield to discord, and the city would fall to destruction and death. But... the mystics had also foretold that the city might be saved by the simplest soul with the smallest and simplest of things. In the city there dwelt a lowly shoemaker, who was known as Tack the Cobbler. Also in the city... existed a Thief, who shall be... nameless.

Super Fantozzi

Superfantozzi (1986) is an Italian film from 1986. It is the fifth film in the saga of the unlucky clerk Ugo Fantozzi, played by its creator, Paolo Villaggio. In this film, Fantozzi is portrayed in a surreal historical journey, from Genesis to 1980s.

Fantozzi to the Rescue

Fantozzi is now retired but continues to go to the office where it is held up as a fine example of employees intending to do career.

D3: The Mighty Ducks

The Ducks are offered scholarships at Eden Hall Academy but struggle with their new coach's methods and come under pressure from the board to retain their scholarships before their big game against the Varsity team.

The God Who Wasn't There

Did Jesus exist? This film starts with that question, then goes on to examine Christianity as a whole.

Delisin

A shy introvert falls for the photographer who took her pictures during high school. Confused and worried, she doubts that love will elapse and can never open up to her lover. Yet she cannot runaway from love.

Cuatro paredes

Plot unavailable

Eight Crazy Nights

Davey Stone, a 33-year old party animal, finds himself in trouble with the law after his wild ways go too far.

Honey, We Shrunk Ourselves

The joke's on absent-minded scientist Wayne Szalinski when his troublesome invention shrinks him, his brother and their wives so effectively that their children think they've completely disappeared. Of course, this gives the kids free rein to do anything they want, unaware that their parents are watching every move.

Android Re-Enactment

Ermus Daglek, retired Empathtek engineer, commandeers a defunct factory where he creates androids based on persons from his past and recreates a dinner party where he lost the love of his life - until they malfunction and escape.

White Noise 2: The Light

A man's family brought back from the verge of death, he then discovers he can identify people who are about to die.

Dr. Ehrlich's Magic Bullet

True story of the doctor who considered it was not immoral to search for a drug that would cure syphilis.

Home of the Brave

The day after they get the word they'll go home in two weeks, a group of soldiers from Spokane are ambushed in an Iraqi city. Back stateside we follow four of them - a surgeon who saw too much, a teacher who's a single mom and who lost a hand in the ambush, an infantry man whose best friend died that day, and a soldier who keeps reliving the moment he killed a civilian woman.

Natale sul Nilo

A womanizing lawyer follows his wife and son to a trip to Egypt in a last-ditch effort to make up for his infidelities. Also travelling to Egypt is a bumbling police chief who's desperate to keep his rebellious daughter from becoming a showgirl. The two meet during a Nile cruise. Calamity ensues.

Morgan Ahmed Morgan

Morgan, who is an uneducated very rich man, is used to buy everything he wants. Now the one thing we wants is a college certificate which he seeks to buy.

The Yankee Doodle Mouse

As Tom and Jerry stage their typical fight sequences, the patriotic soldier theme of the title is evidenced by such things as a carton of eggs labeled "Hen Grenades"; Jerry dropping light bulbs from an airplane like bombs; and Jerry sending a telegram with the message "Sighted Cat - Sank Same." Musical phrasings from various patriotic war songs are heard throughout.

Bad

Hazel runs a beauty salon out of her house, but makes extra money by providing ruthless women the oppurtunity to perform hit jobs. L.T. is a parasite, and contacts Hazel looking for work after he runs out of money. She is reluctant to use him for a hit, since she prefers using women, but decides to try him on a trial basis. Meanwhile, the cop she pays off wants an arrest to make it look like he's doing his job, but Hazel doesn't want to sacrifice any of her "associates". The sleazy side of life is explored in this delightfully dark and deadpan film.

Cremaster 3

CREMASTER 3 (2002) is set in New York City and narrates the construction of the Chrysler Building, which is in itself a character - host to inner, antagonistic forces at play for access to the process of (spiritual) transcendence. These factions find form in the struggle between Hiram Abiff or the Architect ...

The Sandlot: Heading Home

A successful professional baseball player gets his ego in check when he travels back in time to his boyhood sandlot ball-playing days.

Spirited

Each Christmas Eve, the Ghost of Christmas Present selects one dark soul to be reformed by a visit from three spirits. But this season, he picked the wrong Scrooge. Clint Briggs turns the tables on his ghostly host until Present finds himself reexamining his own past, present and future.

Kenneth Williams: Fantabulosa!

Kenneth Williams was the star of the Carry Ons and Round the Horne. Despite his fame, he led a life full of mental torture as he tried to overcome his homosexuality in 1950s Britain. This film follows his life and eventual death based on the many diaries he kept

La Notte

A day in the life of an unfaithful married couple and their steadily deteriorating relationship in Milan.

Pyaasa

Vijay, a destitute poet, searches for true love while attempting to get his work published. With the assistance of two women in his life, his dream comes true - but at a cost that causes Vijay to rethink his worldview.

Il Grido

A sugar-refinery worker flees his Northern Italy town after a woman refuses his marriage proposal.

Leif

In the small working community, the entry in the local newspaper hits like a bomb. The signature "Leif" claims that the town's large arms company Rotum exports weapons illegally. Gunnar Volt, CEO of Rotum, gets a shock. Imagine that someone has the audacity to say that about the community's pride Rotum - even if it now happens to be true. He immediately gathers the management and everyone agrees: Leif must be found - and stopped. But who is this mysterious Leif?

Under the Volcano

Against a background of war breaking out in Europe and the Mexican fiesta Day of Death, we are taken through one day in the life of Geoffrey Firmin, a British consul living in alcoholic disrepair and obscurity in a small southern Mexican town in 1939. The consul's self-destructive behaviour, perhaps a metaphor for a menaced civilization, is a source of perplexity and sadness to his nomadic, idealistic half-brother, Hugh, and his ex-wife, Yvonne, who has returned with hopes of healing Geoffrey and their broken marriage.

Noel

Christmas Eve in New York, and the lonely divorced publisher, Rose Collins, needs a miracle to improve the health of her mother, interned in a hospital with Alzheimers. She feels sorry for another patient and meets his visitor. Meanwhile, Nina Vasquez breaks her engagement with her beloved fiancé Mike due to his suffocating jealousy, but misses him. Mike is stalked by a stranger, bartender Artie Venzuela. The poor Jules arranges to spend Christmas Eve in the hospital, where he spent the best Christmas of his life when he was a teenager. The lives of some of these characters cross with others along the night.

El señor doctor

It's about a country doctor that comes to the city while a clinic is built in his home town... he rubs off his care and compassion on others at the hospital with his humor and wit.

Demolition

An emotionally desperate investment banker finds hope through a woman he meets.

The Tightrope Walkers

Vincent spots Jean-Christophe on the beach, bumps into him not so accidentally, and they hit it off during a fun evening and night. But the next morning Jean-Christophe reveals something that turns Vincent's life upside down. How will they get through the day?

Memoir of a Snail

Forcibly separated from her twin brother when they are orphaned, a melancholic misfit learns how to find confidence within herself amid the clutter of misfortunes and everyday life.

After Midnight

A beautiful fugitive draws a shy film buff out of his shell while she hides in the museum — the cavernous interiors of the Mole Antonelliana in Turin, Italy — where he works as night watchman.

Miracle in Cell No. 7

Dodo Rozak just wants to be a good father to his daughter, Kartika, despite his limited intelligence, acts and behaves like children. In fact, it is Kartika who takes care of her father most of the time. Both live happily.

Fisher

In the small town of Eden, Tennessee, a neglected and naive teenage girl named Clara Banks has made a habit of deceiving people online for gifts, a gambit known as "catfishing." She thinks it's all fun and games until she hooks the attention of the wrong person. A short time later, events set into motion spiral out of control as someone begins stalking Clara and her friends. As the consequences of her actions return to haunt her, twisted messages start showing up at Clara's home, causing her to fear for her life. Will she ever feel safe again now that the evil has come knocking?

Ábreme

The collision between two cultures explodes in one household as all three wait for Javier's immigration papers. A dark comedy that explores immigration, mental health and the magnetism hiding as aversion.

Alex/October

A desperate man places a bizarre classified ad to end his life, but a strange turn of events occurs when an aimless girl decides to answer. As their lives collide, they realize the smallest choices can be the difference between life and death.

Space Man

An agoraphobic man traps himself in an astronaut costume to avoid the disastrous consequences of his condition

Extreme Measures

Guy Luthan, a British doctor working at a hospital in New York, starts making unwelcome enquiries when the body of a man who died in his emergency room disappears. After the trail leads Luthan to the door of an eminent surgeon at the hospital, Luthan soon finds himself in extreme danger people who want the hospital's secret to remain undiscovered.

The Madness of King George

Aging King George III of England is exhibiting signs of madness, a problem little understood in 1788. As the monarch alternates between bouts of confusion and near-violent outbursts of temper, his hapless doctors attempt the ineffectual cures of the day. Meanwhile, Queen Charlotte and Prime Minister William Pitt the Younger attempt to prevent the king's political enemies, led by the Prince of Wales, from usurping the throne.

Click

A married workaholic, Michael Newman doesn't have time for his wife and children, not if he's to impress his ungrateful boss and earn a well-deserved promotion. So when he meets Morty, a loopy sales clerk, he gets the answer to his prayers: a magical remote that allows him to bypass life's little distractions with increasingly hysterical results.

The I Inside

When Simon awakens in the hospital after surviving a near-fatal accident, amnesia has erased the last two years from his memory. He learns that his brother was killed, he has married a woman he doesn't remember and he's haunted by strange visions of the woman he loved.

Bull Street

A woman faces the battle of her life when her estranged father's family tries to evict her and her grandmother from the only home she has ever known.

Wilbur Wants to Kill Himself

The strange comedy film of two close brothers; one, Wilbur, who wants to kill himself, and the other, Harbour, who tries to prevent this. When their father dies leaving them his bookstore they meet a woman who makes their lives a bit better yet with a bit more trouble as well.

K-PAX

Prot is a patient at a mental hospital who claims to be from a far away planet. His psychiatrist tries to help him, only to begin to doubt his own explanations.

Between Friends

Jorge asks Noah for a special favor that questions the limits of friendship and his identity.

All Good Things

Road trips usually signify a beginning but for Isaac and his partner Levi, this is their last chance to spend time together before they part ways. As they drive closer to their destination, Isaac finds that maybe he isn't as prepared for his first breakup as he had thought.

Fearless

After surviving a plane crash that kills many others, Max Klein develops a sense of invulnerability, leading to radical, compulsive actions. Can a psychologist and a fellow guilt-ridden survivor bring him down to earth?

Come, Sweet Death

Former detective Brenner has become an ambulance driver and finds himself, much to his dismay, caught up in a war between two rival first aid organizations.

Patch Adams

The true story of Dr. Hunter "Patch" Adams, who in the 1970s found that humor is the best medicine, and was willing to do just anything to make his patients laugh—even if it meant risking his own career.

Hanging Up

Three sisters - Georgia, Eve, and Maddy - do what they do best with life, love, and lunacy on the telephone lines that bind - when their curmudgeonly father, Lou, is admitted to a Los Angeles Hospital. After years of wild living, intermittent affection, and constant phoning, he is finally threatening to die.

My Brother Is an Only Child

Accio and Manrico are siblings from a working-class family in 1960s Italy: older Manrico is handsome, charismatic, and loved by all, while younger Accio is sulky, hot-headed, and treats life as a battleground — much to his parents' chagrin. After the former is drawn into left-wing politics, Accio joins the fascists out of spite, but his flimsy beliefs are put to test when he falls for Manrico's like-minded girlfriend.

The Quiet

After her widowed father dies, deaf teenager Dot moves in with her godparents, Olivia and Paul Deer. The Deers' daughter, Nina, is openly hostile to Dot, but that does not prevent her from telling her secrets to her silent stepsister, including the fact that she wants to kill her lecherous father.

Hard to Kill

Mason Storm, a 'go it alone' cop, is gunned down at home. The intruders kill his wife, and think they've killed both Mason and his son too. Mason is secretly taken to a hospital where he spends several years in a coma. His son meanwhile is growing up thinking his father is dead. When Mason wakes up, everyone is in danger - himself, his son, his best friend, his nurse - but most of all those who arranged for his death

Umberto D.

When elderly pensioner Umberto Domenico Ferrari returns to his boarding house from a protest calling for a hike in old-age pensions, his landlady demands her 15,000-lire rent by the end of the month or he and his small dog will be turned out onto the street. Unable to get the money in time, Umberto fakes illness to get sent to a hospital, giving his beloved dog to the landlady's pregnant and abandoned maid for temporary safekeeping.

The Assassination of Richard Nixon

It’s 1974 and Sam Bicke has lost everything. His wife leaves him with his three kids, his boss fires him, his brother turns away from him, and the bank won’t give him any money to start anew. He tries to find someone to blame for his misfortunes and comes up with the President of the United States who he plans to murder. Based on a true story.

Rosaline

Left heartbroken after Romeo begins to pursue her cousin Juliet, Rosaline schemes to foil the famous romance and win back her guy in this comedic twist of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet.

Princesses

Caye is a young prostitute whose family is unaware of her profession. She meets her striking Dominican neighbour Zulema, an illegal immigrant, after she finds her in the bathroom, badly beaten up. They strike up a close friendship unbeknownst to Caye's xenophobic co-workers.

Die Aufschneider

Plot unavailable

Bean

Childlike Englishman, Mr. Bean, is an incompetent watchman at the Royal National Gallery. After the museum's board of directors' attempt to have him fired is blocked by the chairman, who has taken a liking to Bean, they send him to Los Angeles to act as their ambassador for the unveiling of a historic painting to humiliate him. Fooled, Mr. Bean must now successfully unveil the painting or risk his and a hapless Los Angeles curator's termination.

Rocky II

After Rocky goes the distance with champ Apollo Creed, both try to put the fight behind them and move on. Rocky settles down with Adrian but can't put his life together outside the ring, while Creed seeks a rematch to restore his reputation. Soon enough, the "Master of Disaster" and the "Italian Stallion" are set on a collision course for a climactic battle that is brutal and unforgettable.

Emma's Bliss

Upon being informed that he is fatally ill with cancer, Max, who works at a used car store, steals money which his boss has gained through illegal means. When fleeing from the scene of the crime Max crashes his car. He is pulled unconscious from the destroyed vehicle by a homely young woman, Emma, who lives alone on a farm where Max decides to stay in order to hide from the police and his boss.

23

The movie's plot is based on the true story of a group of young computer hackers from Hannover, Germany. In the late 1980s the orphaned Karl Koch invests his heritage in a flat and a home computer. At first he dials up to bulletin boards to discuss conspiracy theories inspired by his favorite novel, R.A. Wilson's "Illuminatus", but soon he and his friend David start breaking into government and military computers. Pepe, one of Karl's rather criminal acquaintances senses that there is money in computer cracking - he travels to east Berlin and tries to contact the KGB.

Raindrops, Waters, Warriors

A three-part omnibus consisting of Kino Klub amateurs' work: Zivojin Pavlovic's dialogue-free "Live Waters" set in 1943, Marko Babac's "Warriors" about psychological look at the two patients in a hospital room, as well as Kokan Rakonjac's "Raindrops" about alcoholic's decaying relationship with his girlfriend.

Keluang Man

Borhan, a former patient at a mental hospital in Tampoi, lives a life as a mysterious hero named Keluang Man. He uses his martial arts expertise and his wits to fight crime in the small town of Kluang. Borhan must face a major threat when a secret criminal organisation emerges, led by his archenemy, Shamsir. Aided by his friend Inspector Sahab, Borhan struggles with internal conflicts, questions about his sanity, and the challenges of being a true protector.

Latin Blood – The Ballad of Ney Matogrosso

From a repressive childhood to artistic revolution, Ney Matogrosso transforms Brazil's stages — and himself — through music, creativity and inner fire. The movie displays briefly one of the greatest controversies surrounding Ney Matogrosso, accused of copying the rock band Kiss. It's actually the other way around. Secos & Molhados was officially formed in 1971, though the band was performing together since the late 60s and was already known for their make-up. KISS came around years later, in 1973.

World Trade Center

Two police officers struggle to survive when they become trapped beneath the rubble of the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001.

The Men

Ken, a WWII GI, returns home after he's paralyzed in battle. Residing in the paraplegic ward of a veteran's hospital and embittered by his condition, he refuses to see his fiancée and sinks into a solitary world of hatred and hostility. Head physician, Dr. Brock cajoles the withdrawn Ken into the life of the ward, where fellow patients Norm, Leo and Angel begin to pull him out of his spiritual dilemma.

Reclaim Your Brain

Frustrated, because he is forced to produce bad TV-shows, a manager of a TV-station, enters the station and manipulates the ratings, to initiate a TV-revolution.

Irina Palm

Maggie, a quiet retiring grandmother, finds herself helpless as her grandson’s health deteriorates. When one last chance appears, but money is desperately short, Maggie acts to raise the cash in a fashion that surprises everyone but her.

We Own the Night

A New York nightclub manager tries to save his brother and father from Russian mafia hitmen.

Jack & Sarah

Jack always lands on his feet. He lands on his feet when he marries the beautiful Sarah. He lands on his feet when he buys a luxurious new home. However, when Sarah goes into labour, he takes a tumble down the stairs and lands on his head. When he comes around he discovers he is the proud father of a baby girl, but deficient in the spouse department to the tune of 1.

While You Were Sleeping

A transit worker pulls commuter Peter off railway tracks after he's mugged, but—while he's in a coma—his family mistakenly thinks she's Peter's fiancée, and she doesn't correct them. Things get more complicated when she falls for his brother, who's not quite sure that she's who she claims to be.

The Elephant Man

A Victorian surgeon rescues a heavily disfigured man being mistreated by his "owner" as a side-show freak. Behind his monstrous façade, there is revealed a person of great intelligence and sensitivity. Based on the true story of Joseph Merrick (called John Merrick in the film), a severely deformed man in 19th century London.

Dumber Heroes

A comedy set in a weird hospital populated by spies, mental people, an exorcist, you name it! Plus the world's most beautiful nurse. Together they track down a dangerous terrorist who is trying to blow up the city. The future of the city is in their hands.

Desperate Measures

San Francisco police officer Frank Connor is in a frantic search for a compatible bone marrow donor for his gravely ill son. There's only one catch the potential donor is convicted multiple murderer Peter McCabe who sees a trip to the hospital as the perfect opportunity to get what he wants most: freedom. With McCabe's escape, the entire hospital becomes a battleground and Connor must pursue and, ironically, protect the deadly fugitive who is his son's only hope for survival.

Shallow Hal

After taking his dying father's advice, Hal dates only the embodiments of female physical perfection. But that all changes after Hal has an unexpected run-in with self-help guru Tony Robbins. Intrigued by Hal's shallowness, Robbins hypnotizes him into seeing the beauty that exists even in the least physically appealing women. Hal soon falls for Rosemary, but he doesn't realize that his gorgeous girlfriend is actually a 300-pound-not-so-hottie.

He Was a Quiet Man

An unhinged office worker who planned to go on a shooting spree at his workplace struggles with his newfound status as a hero after he ends up stopping a shooting spree instead.

A Dangerous Game

Detectives Dick Williams and Andy McAllister find themselves trying to solve several crimes at an isolated mentally-ill hospital, where the patients range from slightly daffy to criminally insane, and they don't know which is which. A gang is out to steal a fortune inherited by one of the patients and, before Dick and Andy solve the case, several patients are transferred to the cemetery. And 'tiddlie-winks" are indeed involved.